Revelations
by hopeforever123
Summary: This is my first Delena fic so please bare with me. I have left the story so that I can write more chapters, but I need encouraging reviews in order to do so. Rated T for violent exes, language, and potential "affectionate" behavior. Please R and R :)


*****Author's Note. I received a review on this complaining about the fact that I listed this story as complete when it's not. I understand the frustration. But I am not exactly in the best mental and physical health right now, so for me, this very well could be the end. It is complete. As I said in the summary, if I get a lot of nice, encouraging reviews, I might decide to continue the story. If I continue and write another chapter, I will change it to In-Progress. Until then, I will leave it this way, because I do not have time to continue right now. This weekend I will try my best, I promise.*****

As I sit in my tub, letting the hot water wash away my sins, I reflect. Who am I? My name is Damon Salvatore. I am over a hundred years old. My _father_ forced me to become this monster, but my brother, _Stefan_, is the reason that I turned. Stefan and Damon Salvatore. Are we really connected anymore? It seems that the only thing Stefan needs me for is to help Elena. But then again, I imagine Stefan isn't a big fan of me anymore since I slept with his girl. But-it wasn't just sex. I love Elena. I've been in love with her since the day I met her. She admitted that she has feelings for me. Everything was going perfectly until this stupid sire bond business. I told her to leave me. I let her go; just like Stefan asked. But he's still not happy, because she still doesn't want him. There's nothing I want more than to take Elena back in my arms; but I can't. I can't subject myself to the pain of loving her when her feelings might not even be real. She's been digging through the library every night now. I can hear her. She was on the phone with Jeremy the other day. Something about a blood bond. She must be joking if she thinks that I'll actually go through with it. I tilt my bottle of bourbon back as the last drops come out. _Damn_ _it._ _Baby brother's_ been in my bourbon storage. Between him and 'Lena I'm running low.

Elena has been staying in the room adjacent to mine. It's torture; knowing that she's just within my reach. Stefan's moved back into his room. I think he's down in the foyer now; probably gulping down my bourbon supply. I hear the front door open and close. Elena's home. "Hey Stefan." She speaks in almost a whisper.

I imagine my brother giving his slight brooding nod of greeting. Him and his broodyness. Constantly broody. Mr. Depressing. I get why she chose him. Safety, safety, safety. But I know _her_. I know that Stefan's not what she needs. Elena need someone that can give her a love that consumes her. She needs passion. She needs _me_. _Damn it_. I need to stop thinking like this. I need to stop letting _her_ consume _me_.

"Stefan, I need to talk to you."

"So, talk." I hear Stefan lower himself onto the sofa and set his glass down on the arm. Ass can't even bother to use a coaster. Wouldn't want to ruin _daddy's_ favorite couch. I hear Elena shuffle further into the room and lean against the opposite couch.

"I know that things are weird between us. I know that you kinda hate me-"

"I don't hate you, Elena. I hate that I can't be who you need; who you want." There he goes again. Broody, "poor me," Stefan. Wonderful.

"Stefan, I'm sorry. I really am. God, everything I do hurts someone else. I just, I wish that it were simple. I love you, Stefan. I really do. But I'm not_ in love_ with you anymore."

God I need a drink. I dry off and pull on my black jeans, shoes and black V-neck. My jacket's downstairs. _Dammit_. It's on the couch Stefan's sitting on.

"We both know that you can't love me this way. I know that you will always love me, but I can't be with someone that can't accept me for what I've become. The old Elena that you loved; the fragile, _human_, Elena, she died, Stefan."

Yes, Stefan. She died the minute you saved Matt instead of her. She shouldn't have died that day. She _shouldn't_ be this. At least I still love and accept her this way, unlike dearest baby brother.

"She's gone. It's clear to me that you can't accept that I am a vampire. You can't keep trying to fix me, especially when you can't control your own bloodlust. I'm happy, Stefan. I can drink blood bags. I'm not killing anyone by drinking those. I'm happy. I've accepted that this is what I am. I wish that it could be different, but I'm in love with Damon. I know how much that hurts you, and I'm so sorry. But I can't help the way I feel."

At her last words, my un-beating heart pangs with longing. I know what comes next. I hear Stefan stand abruptly, sending the sofa flying back to hit the bookcase with a thud. I run downstairs and get between the two of them. Stefan's hands are clenched and his eyes are filled with anger, hints of the veins under his eyes are starting to show through his pale skin. Elena is still seated on the couch, though she has curled into a ball.

"Stefan, _what the hell are you doing_?"

*****Thank you for the encouraging reviews! I promise to have the next chapter up by Sunday night at the latest. I am having some personal issues right now but I will try my best!*****


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